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Take off your stupid trucker hats first of all. Do you have to copy everything you see on MTV? Also, the only time you should be wearing a wrist band is if you are engaged in a sporting event that causes you to sweat…so stop with the one wrist band bullshit pronto. And for christ sake, sandals are for the beach, retard. Stop wearing them out to bars and outdoor cafes. If I wanted to see your feet I’d f***ing ask. It’s so repulsive how you losers simply copy everyone else around you. Have some individuality man.

*Angry Ken says: …I had to edit this heavily for punctuation.

Has anyone seen the Burger King commercials for their new stacker burgers, or whatever they call them?  I’m all about eating way more than the human body should allow, but FOUR patties of meat on one bun is a little ridiculous, even to me.  I would rather eat two doubles than a “quad”.

This is nothing new with BK though.  Their giant breakfast sandwich is actually called “the giant breakfast sandwich”.  Egg, meat and cheese, and meat and cheese, and meat and, meat, and maybe some more cheese.  Good lord that’s alot of samich.  No wonder America is fatter than ever. 

I’m not really complaining though.  I think the combo meals at most places are too small anyway.  If I’m gonna spend between $5-7, I want to get my money’s worth.  So I say bring on the big burgers, super sized fries, and 64 oz soft drink. 

Just not 4 patties on one bun.  That’s too much.

…and so should you if you actually go see this movie. I saw one commercial for this piece of crap, and that was enough. Who exactly is this movie supposed to appeal to anyway? Maybe the tagline should be “If you liked Van Wilder, then you’ll hate this movie. And if you hated Van Wilder, you’ll still hate this movie.” It’ll be on HBO in a month, and still not worth a glance.

Let’s not forget another work of cinematic brilliance heading to theaters, “Little Man”. Apparently film studio big wigs seem to ignore just how much money they have lost on all Wayans brothers movies, because they keep allowing these f*ckers to make films. The Wayans brothers aren’t, and never were, funny. Damon Wayans is the exception, and luckily he seems to stay far away from his brothers’ work. Black people aren’t even going to go see this movie. Films like this and the forementioned John Tucker are an insult to the American movie-going public.

Thanks to “Catahdin” for the submission.
Iraq….does anyone on this side of the world really care? …Com’on……how does any of this complicate or influence your daily routines? …be honest…it doesn’t. I’m sorry to say that as of late, I just tune the news out on anything involving Iraq. It’s mind numbing…I and others stated as long ago as three years, that this ‘toilet hole’ would collapse into a civil war. When are the ‘monkeys’ in Washington going to wake up and realize these barbarians are just that………….enough already!

Angry Ken says - Like I keep saying, we need to just blow everything up over there and take all the oil. Gas prices are ridiculous.

A few months ago, I started the daily made up fact, which was just that; facts that were totally made up by your’s truly. But researching made up facts is not easy. So if you have a made up fact you’d like to contribute, click on “submissions” and send away. For examples of what the hell I am talking about, click here.

My personal favorites are Christopher Walken’s secret bakery and the one about Abe Lincoln.

The liberal media feeds you false information all the time. At least this fake news is funny.

Particularly if you have ever lived in an apartment complex, you’ve probably listened in on a neighbor having an argument of some sort.  This is probably even more true if you live next to people that are, how you say, somewhat lacking in class.

Domestic disturbances are a funny thing.  They seem to follow a pattern.  They almost always happen late at night, often when you’re trying to sleep.  You’re laying there in bed, waiting to drift off when you hear a loud crash, such as breaking glass.  You leap up and look out your window, but don’t see anything.  After a few minutes you get back in bed.

No sooner than you shut your eyes do you here another crash, followed by someone yelling.  Again, you rush to the window and peer through the blinds, keeping your light off as not to be seen.  You watch the people arguing with each other, yelling and screaming. 

Now you’re hooked and end up watching this play out for the next hour or so.  Everytime you think it’s over, it’s so not.  You end up getting out of bed about 7 or 8 times after hearing somebody yelling or cursing.  Once it dies down, you give it around 10 more minutes before finally giving up on any more action happening.

You know you’ve done this before.  It’s fun, except when one of the participants gets violent.  That’s when you might want to get involved by calling the police so no one gets hurt.  You know how rednecks are when they’ve been drinking.

Last night during the MLB All-Star game player introductions on fox, the local news broke in with a weather report. Now maybe I overreacted, but I was pretty pissed off. If you live in Cincinnati, you know how crappy the Fox 10 o’clock news is and how overexcited the weather guy gets when bad weather rolls in.

Anyway, here’s my angry email I sent to the station just moments after the untimely interruption.

“You have got to be kidding me! Breaking in and interrupting the introductions during the MLB All-Star game is totally unacceptable. You know damn well there was nothing going on with the weather that was worth interrupting the game for. You only did it because you knew more people than usual would be watching Fox, so you took it upon your self to take advantage of the opportunity to force everyone to listen to your crappy weather report and feed Rich Apuzzo’s ego. Nobody gives a crap about your highly innacurate weather coverage. You people get excited when bad storms come and think it’s the end of human existence as we know it. Not only is your weather report lousy, but your entire news program is a joke. Why is the 10 o’clock news an hour long? I guess you can’t fit American Idol coverage in with just a half hour.

You should be ashamed of yourselves for the interruption of such an event as the All-Star game, because you know damn well you did it to serve your own personal agendas and to increase ratings. Whoever made that decision should be fired. I don’t care if a hurricane is coming.

Don’t interrupt any sports game!

Sincerely, Angry Ken”

I don’t care. That crap really pissed me off.  What’s next, the Superbowl?

If you ask me, the new movie “Miami Vice” is going to really suck big time.  Even fans of the popular 80’s tv show won’t want to see it.  It doesn’t even have anything to do with the 80’s, which is the allure of the show, even today.

I’m not a fan of Jamie Fox, and I absolutely despise Colin Farrell.  I’m not paying any sort of money to go see what will likely turn out to be a steaming pile of cinematic crap.  This movie would have been better done as a comedy, starring someone who wasn’t on drugs.

Luckily there are much better movies out like “Superman Returns” and “Pirates of the Carribbean”.

Believe it or not, I really like the food at Hooters.  I don’t just go there for the scenery.

Especially lately.

About the last 9 times I’ve been to Hooters, I’ve either gotten a crappy waitress, crappy food, plain crappy service. 

The problems usually arise from the girl waiting on us.  Each time, whoever it is, she is total bitch, appears to be high and incoherent, or has no visible personality.  You can just tell the girl does not want to be there at all.

And I’m not a shallow guy, but you have to wonder anymore about the hiring standards at this place.  Clearly the bar has been lowered a bit.  I’m likely to give a bigger tip to someone that is friendly and somewhat cheerful than one that just seems bored.

It’s now become a running joke among my friends and I about what will go wrong this time when we go.  Will the waitress be on drugs?  Will she make it clear that she doesn’t give a shit?  Will the chicken be served raw?  Will we have to wait over an hour after eating just to get our check? 

Despite all this, I still seem to go there for some reason.  And no, it’s not for that reason that you’re thinking.  I really do like the wings.  They are especially delicious.