Actually, John Kerry is just an a$$hole.  Even the Democrats should be shaking their head at this guy.

http://www.cnn.com/2006/POLITICS/10/31/kerry.mccain/index.html

Anyone who goes to a Halloween party this year dressed as the Crocodile Hunter is a d-bag, plain and simple. Particularly if they have a stingray as part of it. That’s not cool, unoriginal, and lame. If you did this, I hope you got kicked out of whatever party you were at. Serious d-baggery here.

Also, nobody better show up to a party dressed as the Crow. Every Halloween party there’s like 14 guys that come dressed like the Crow because they want to look hot and hook up. It’s lame. If you come dressed as the Crow, you shouldn’t get in to the party!

I love South Park.

Saturday Night Live is bad this year.  I mean really REALLY bad.   Just when you think it can’t get any worse, it does.  More on this later

Thanks to “Budai” for the submission.

You want to know what has been pissing me off lately? LOUD lesbians.

The people in question bowl on the TSABA league on Thursdays that I am in. It’s like they all have a megaphone surgically implanted in their vocal chords! They make a strike, they start doing the Vonage commercial themes. It drives me insane. WHY IN THE HELL WOULD YOU SING THE VONAGE “WOO-HOO-HOO” THEME WHEN YOU MAKE A STRIKE?

And what makes it even worse, you can hear it all the way down the fuckin’ alley.

And the only male on the team doesn’t help at all. He reminds me of Hank Hill’s dad from King of the Hill. He’s short. He’s annoying. He’s rude. Now I want to go kill the person who wrote the Vonage commercial theme.

Angry Ken says: The Vonage song is actually performed by The 5, 6, 7, 8’s and was first featured in “Kill Bill: Volume 1.” Click here for the song’s lyrics

And if there is a real life version of Cotton Hill out there, I’d sure like to meet him and listen to his stories of how he killed “fitty” men.

The first shots have been fired in the war against crapism, by ME. As you all know, I hate the band Hinder. And with good cause. Not only do they totally suck, they try to tell good bands that they are the ones that suck, and are not “rock and roll.” Like Hinder knows what rock is.

The guys in Hinder also like to jerk each other off. Seriously, that’s what I heard.

Anyway, I paid a little visit to Hinder’s lame ass website (much lamer than mine I might add). So now I will proceed to make fun of it.

These guys are rock? Nice purple shirt and blazer combo, jackass. Are you waiting for the other guys to put their weiners in your hands? And what’s with the redhead dude. Every picture he’s got his head tilted back like he’s some kind of gangster. Gangster of fisting dudes maybe? And it looks like that other guy used the lead singer’s jizz to do his hair. Are these f***ers rock or emo? Depends on which picture you look at I guess. What do you say A.W.E.S.O.M-O.?

LAME! NOT COOL.

So now we’re into the cream of crapton at:

http://www.hindermusic.com/

Of course the first thing we see is one of the crappiest bands ever assembled, so it is what you would expect so far. Apparently some of the guys had trouble deciding who was going to be Bon Jovi and who would be John Melloncamp. I don’t have to tell you which ones. Scroll down and you can leave Hinder a message telling them how much they suck ass. Done.

Click on the giant portrait of lame and we go right into the site. It’s really just a big advertisement for people to buy cd’s and concert tickets. LAME. Oh but what’s this? The “Catfight of the Week.” Yes, each week let’s put up a picture of two slutbag groupies we met on the road and see which one is voted as the hottest, just to prove how much we love and respect women. Right? Sounds like a case of serious d-baggery to me. Even better, as I’m writing this, one of these is just a picture of Lindsey Lohan from a photo shoot a couple years ago. But the name doesn’t say Lindsey. Today she is Nicole? Who do they think they’re fooling? Well, I guess the inbred hicks that call themselves Hinder fans would buy this crap.

Speaking of Hinder fans…

Here’s Matthew. He is Hinder’s “fan of the week,” and here’s what he has to say…

“I didn’t know when I bought your cd I was gonna listen to it night after day, over and over again. I thought y’all wrote only about smokin’ pot until I got the cd and I relized how much I related to your songs. When Katrina hit and the power was out all I had was your cd to listen to, and most songs got played out but I could listen to yours forever. Thx for the kick ass tunes.”

Funny, when they released that fucking lips of an angel song I didn’t think it would be played on the radio “night after day,” over and over again. Which is why “they all” who write songs about smoking pot shouldn’t turn around and write whiny bitch songs like that. Exactly which part did you relate to Matthew? The part about getting stoned, or the one about cheating on your girlfriend? And explain this to me. If all the f^%ing power was out, how the f**k did you listen to this worthless cd?!!! You must got some long lasting ass batteries in your discman dude.

I must admit though, Matthew doesn’t look like as big a d-bag as I thought a Hinder fan would. Not like, say, THIS GUY…

Oh don’t worry buddy. I’ll get to you soon enough. In fact, I am going to make this the newest feature here on Angry Ken. Hinder’s lame ass fan of the week. No one will be spared.

This is by no means a one time deal. I will not rest until everyone realizes how much Hinder fucking sucks. So if you’re going to choose a side, choose the side of good, the side that will stand up against crappy music like Hinder. Join the Angry Ken Nation. Hinder is going down. This is only the beginning.

By the way, OK Go is awesome.

Thanks to “Bitchingbarbie” for the submission.

My friend’s mom fucking sucks. I’m asked to plan a bachelorette party. Got it set in stone and the (bitch) cancels the appointment I made and attempts to make the party her way. Fuck the bitch. Sometimes I just want to punch her lights out! Mothers just need to learn how to shut their fucking mouth and mind their own goddamn business! If they all shut their pie holes for one minute I think the world would actually experience some fucking peace!

Angry Ken says: It really sucks when one slutty party idea is undercut by someone else’s slutty party idea. If only the oppposing slutty plans could be combined into one slutty bash. Now that would be a good old slutty time.

Anyone who buys “Diddy’s” new cd should immediately be punched right in the face when at the cash register. They deserve it. Just like “Diddy” himself deserves to be shot in the face.  Then he puts this garbage on Youtube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3dy71ERzZ8

What the fuck is he even talking about?  What a fucking tard! Congratulations Puff, you can read a poem.  Then you have Funk Master Flex yelling like a retard about Bad Boi rekids.  He is the second most obnoxious guy in hip hop next to Diddy.

Press play?  More like press stop.  Actually, press eject, take the cd over to the toilet, and press flush.  That is if you were actually stupid enough to buy it, which in that case, see above statement.
Diddy, please die.

Well it was bound ot happen. They made a rap out of the icecream truck song. God help us all.

Still pissed off…

Still hates the Steelers…

Still thinks the band Hinder sucks ass…

Still making fun of ghetto people and white trash…

Still… ANGRY

Angry Ken returns. Prepare to lambasted.