Thanks Beantown for the movie review.

So, Miami Vice… Unlike everyone’s low expectations for the movie it actually delivered. Despite the loud f*ck sitting behind me talking as loudly as possible, chewing like a cow, and laughing at all the wrong parts, I enjoyed the movie. To start, after the opening you know the MGM or whateva screen, the movie gets right into it. No credits, no actor names, directors, none of dat.  At this point I was excited. I have to say the best part, were the action scenes. Now I love action flicks, but i have yet to see a movie where as someone is getting shot, it’s so explicit that you feel the pain. Micheal Mann spared no one with that. The love scenes yeah…I got horny, I’m sorry but DAMN!! All in all, the action was great, the story line worked perfectly well, Colin’s moustache was horrible, Jaime Fox was smoldering, that asian lady was very sexy. Man I cant get this one scene out of my head where (about to ruin it for you) Jamie Fox was so upset at this dude for kidnapping his girl, he kicked his ass to the ground and as the guy was crawling to safety(away from Jamie) he looks at him feeling sorry for him then just puts one right in his head! Man that was brutal! Sorry for ruining that scene but…you know. I’d recommend it, just dont stuff your stomach to much u might gag at some shooting scenes.

Angry Ken says: I still think it’s gonna suck without pastel suits.

I went and saw Nacho Libre this past weekend and let me tell you.  This is one of the funniest movies I have ever seen.  I’m not writing a review, I just want to recommend this movie to anyone who likes silly comedy.  If you like Napoleon Dynamite, you’re sure to like Nacho Libre.  Plus, it has a great soundtrack and an ending good enough to rival that of “Rocky”.

What exactly does it mean to “ride dirty”?  The other night, a couple of my friends and I began discussing the various possibilities of the meaning of this phrase from that stupid Nate Dogg song.

We first established that riding meant driving a car, as the line “We rollin’ dey hatin’” would refer to driving while the police/white man/white policeman is hating on them, or perhaps just making sure they don’t kill anybody. 

So now we’re riding in a car, most likely an uber expensive make and model with a wheel and tire combination that completely eliminates any hint of decent ride quality.  Anyway, ridng dirty probably means one or more of the following:

Riding with drugs (most likely crack, pot, paraphernalia, etc.),

Riding with stolen goods or money,

Riding with underage girls in the backseat (R. Kelly?),

Riding in a dirty car that hasn’t been washed,

Riding when you haven’t showered in a little while,

Riding with the clap maybe?

Hopefully now most of you have a little better idea of what it is to ride dirty, so now you can avoid being caught.  If it’s one thing I hate, it’s to be caught ridin’ dirty.  So turn your lights on at night, stay in your lane, and obey the designated speed limits.  Ya don wan dem foos ta catch ya ridin’ dirtay yo!

If you live in Cincinnati and were a fan of 97.3 FM Channel Z, chances are you probably aren’t anymore.  Frankly, they just suck now.  Thanks to the stupid “shuffle” bullshit,  I can’t believe some of the songs I hear when I tune to them.  How many times a day does anyone want to hear the old Cake song “Going the Distance?” Or how about the theme to the Drew Carey Show?  Why the f*ck would you play a song titled “Cleveland Rocks” in Cincinnati!? 

There are countless other lame songs that are probably playing there right now.  I’m fine with playing older songs, but they play songs from 10 years ago that were never really that good to begin with.  And can they go more than 20 minutes without playing a song from Nirvana? If I hear “Smells like Teen Spirit” one more time I’m going to jerk the wheel into a damn ditch! 

I’m not saying that 97.3 is all bad, but this shuffle garbage has got to go.  And I think I could pull a better morning show out of my ass.

I know I’m not the only person that feels this way.  Everyone I’ve talked to thinks 97.3 sucks now.  I guess WEBN is the only place left for real rock/alternative in Cincinnati.

First, let’s make one thing clear.  I didn’t watch American Idol and I think the whole thing is stupid.  But I did see some of the first auditions (after that the show is totally pointless).  But back then I said that Taylor Hicks, or as I called him, “the grey haired guy”, would win the whole thing.  Let this be further proof that I am always right about everything.

American Idol still sucks though.

You may have heard about the latest dance craze sweeping the nation called “ghost riding the whip.” Here’s how you do it.  You get your car to do a slow cruise down the road while you get out and dance along side the car as it’s rolling.  Yes, it’s as dumb as it sounds.  See for yourself.  (I’ll put a link here later, or just Google ghost ride the whip.)

So here’s what is bound to happen.  On a slow day, you’ll see a story on your local news about some dumbass getting run over while ghost riding his whip.  Then they’ll talk about how controversial it is and how cops are cracking down and how many teens want to ghost ride the whip.  I can’t wait when they report about some stupid teen that broke his leg after his honda civic ran him over while he was dancing.

I really don’t want to see this crap unless someone can actually be creative with it.  Jumping out of a car and flailing about like a retarded gymnast is just stupid.  I wanna see some sweet moves.  Although it doesn’t really get any better than seeing someone become a human speed bump and get rolled over by their own vehicle.  Now THAT’s what ghost riding the whip is all about! 

Just wanted to warn everyone. Do not see this movie. Plain and simple; it sucked. The plot made no sense, there was no character delvelopment, the fight scenes were repetitive, and it wasn’t even 90 minutes long (which I guess was a good thing). The only good thing about this movie was that Milla Jovovich looked hot. But that’s hardly worth the price of admission. One of the worst movies I’ve ever seen.

I guess the Grammy awards are tonight. Awards shows like this make me sick, so I don’t watch anymore. I have no idea who is nominated for what, and I don’t care. The music industry is completely pointless. No one today is worth a fraction of the money they make. I haven’t bought a CD in 3 years. If anyone good is actually performing tonight let me know. And by good, I mean someone who plays instruments and has been around for more than 8 years. I don’t need to see some rapper(s) jumping around on stage with their shirt hanging below their knees and some ugly ass jewelry they got swindled into paying more than their life is worth.

On second thought, maybe I will watch. That way I can make fun of everyone on the show.

And anyone who can guess correctly where this post’s title comes from gets (what else) a Grammy!

I mentioned this earlier, but it still angers me. I’m talking about that Diet Pepsi commercial with “Diddy.” You probably saw it and thought the same thing that everyone in America thought, “god that sucked.” Way to spend $2.5 million.

I’ve hated Diddy for years. It’s not enough for his constant name changes, crappy music, ugly clothing line, or his stupid sunglasses to piss me off. Now he’s making crappy commercials. Who the hell thought this was a good idea? That must be a crack marketing team over at Pepsi.

Does anyone over the age of 12 consider Diddy to be “cool”? The guy is so fucking lame. What makes it worse is that he thinks everyone in the world is always paying attention to him. Why he thinks an overbite and wearing sunglasses at all hours of the day is a good idea escapes me. Biggie must be rolling in his grave at what a sellout this guy has become.

I also think that “Diddy” was the one who set up Biggie so that he could take the spotlight.

One of the best shows to be on tv recently that very few people knew about was called “Stella.” Based on the comedy troupe of the same name, “Stella” was written and performed by comics David Wain, Michael Ian Black and Michael Showalter and aired weekly on Comedy Central. The first time I saw this show I was hooked. The off the wall comedy was so much different from anything else out there. I went on to watch every episode of the show’s first, and so far only season, and freakin’ loved it.

Here’s the problem. It doesn’t look like the show is going to be picked up for another season. The funniest show I’ve seen in years isn’t going to be on anymore. It really doesn’t surprise me since it was a different kind of comedy that alot of people just probably wouldn’t understand or even give a chance to. It’s really a shame because I and several others really enjoyed it.

If you haven’t seen an episode of “Stella”, I encourage everyone who enjoys comedy to check it out. If you’re not a moron, or even if you are, you’ll probably laugh your ass off.