I don’t give a sh*t!

After a few weeks back in the Nati, I’m now back in lousy LA. Being home made me realize how much better I like it in Cincinnati.

Oh well. The plan is to move back sometime in 2008 (or early 2009 at the latest), unless I go insane in the process.

Someone really needs to build a Skyline Chili out here!

It’s a real shame that so many people nowadays take God and religion for granted. Especially punkass teenagers who aren’t old enough or smart enough to think for themselves.

He says OK now, but he’s gonna feel really shitty when there’s no Xbox under that tree on Christmas morning.

You know what I’ve done and plan to keep on doing this weekend? Absolutely nothing! And it’s been everything I thought it could be.

The biggest weekend event comes tomorrow morning when the Bengals play the Cleveland Clowns. This should be an easy win, but I won’t be satisfied with anything less than a two-touchdown victory. And much furniture will be thrown should the Bengals manage to lose. But Cleveland really really really sucks.

I wonder how many quarters into the game it takes them to put Brady Quinn in. If you ask me, they might as well seeing that their season is already over just one game in. But then again, this is Cleveland we’re talking about.

Look at that. A post about laziness managed to turn into a discussion of football. Much like everything in life should.

For the life of me, I don’t know how someone cannot own a television. Especially people with money that can afford one. This just does not make sense. I personally could not live without tv. Not owning a tv shows me that one does not like sports, and that simply will not stand. Get a tv and watch something good, like a bowling tournament.

That sh*t is redonkey kong!
OUT!

Do breakfast cereals still get the same fanfare they did when I was a kid? I just remember watching cartoons in the morning and seeing commercials for the new marshmallow in Lucky Charms or a new swirl in Cinnamon Toast Crunch.  Then you’d beg your mom to buy you the cereal so you could experience the new thrill of Trix were actually shaped like the fruit flavors they represented.

Does that still happen with kids today, or did the cereals reach their peak when I was younger?

Just how cookoo for Cocoa Puffs are people today?

I have self diagnosed myself with Attention Deficit Disorder or A.D.D. But not just any A.D.D. This is what I like to call E.A.D.D. (Entertainment Attention Deficit Disorder). This is when one form of media simply will not do.

Take me for example. I often cannot stick to watching a movie, tv show, playing a video game, or surfing the net. I have to do it all at once. I start to watch something, then decide I want to pause it (Tivo) and start playing a video game. Or check my email. Or write on my stupid blog. Or see what bball game is on. You get the idea.

I suppose I just have an insatiable appetite for all things electronic entertainment. Maybe I could get some entertainment Ritalin.

You gotta love those cheap tv commercials for those “urban” clothing stores at the mall.  They are so ridiculous that you can only laugh.

You know the stores I’m talking about.  They have names like “Step ‘N’ Style” or “Tha Hard Ta Knock Shoppe,” where you can go for all your ghetto clothing needs.  What I can’t understand is why every mall around here needs like 5 or 6 of these stores.

Anyway, back to the commercials.  First of all, they look they like they were filmed on a cheap camcorder found on the side of the road on trash day.  And of course you have to have some dude rapping about all the clothes you can get (Baby Phat, G-Unit, whatever).

And let’s not forget the ghetto children (bebe’s kids) that they always have in the commercial, wearing their Sean John and Rocawear fur bubble coats.  They always look lost too, with blank stares on their faces while they stand there and model the clothes, or they are rapping out of synch with the music. 

The audio/visuals also just as bad.  I saw commercial where the picture was so dark you couldn’t even see the person.  I know that sounds bad, but it’s true.  And the audio sounds like it was recorded on a cassette player in a laundry room with the dryer on.  What the hell are they saying?   

There also a great commercial for place around here called “Uloho’s” (or something).  It’s one of those places where they sell like 30” rims to put on your 1986 Cutlass, effectively making the wheels worth more than the actual car itself.  Not to mention the stepladder now required to actually get in the vehicle.  Good luck trying to take a corner at more than 15 mph in that rig.  The commercial features some incoherent homemade rap with some ghetto dudes yelling nonsensicals at the camera while pointing at their spinners.  What you basically hear is;

“BlubudubahjibbajabbaULOHOSbabbledabblefimmelfammelaightyaheard.” 

Then they show what is supposedly Chad Johnson, but you can’t be sure because the lighting is so bad and you can’t hear what he’s saying.

Hilarious!

These places have everything you need to satisfy your inner thug or hood rat.  Everything except taste.

Anyone who goes to a Halloween party this year dressed as the Crocodile Hunter is a d-bag, plain and simple. Particularly if they have a stingray as part of it. That’s not cool, unoriginal, and lame. If you did this, I hope you got kicked out of whatever party you were at. Serious d-baggery here.

Also, nobody better show up to a party dressed as the Crow. Every Halloween party there’s like 14 guys that come dressed like the Crow because they want to look hot and hook up. It’s lame. If you come dressed as the Crow, you shouldn’t get in to the party!

I love South Park.

This has gone on long enough.  M*&#er f**cking gas prices!  I’ve had enough.  The time has come for action.  Only problem is what action.  While all of us are being raped at the pump, big oil execs are leaning back in their offices lighting cigars with hundred dollar bills.  I say bullsh*t.  We must all make a stand.

Here’s the other thing that really bothers me.  A few months ago, gas hovered a little over the $2 mark.  Back then (again just a few months) this was considered high.  Unfortunately, we’ve gotten so used to $3+ gas that we’ve forgotten what it used to cost.  Unfortunately, this is going to keep happening up to the $4 mark and so on.  Yeah, we’ll all get pissed when it gets up to $4, but after a while we’ll be happy to see a gas station advertising $3.60 a gallon.  And it shouldn’t be that way!

I recently went from a 4-cylinder car up to a powerful V8.  Now I have to fill up nearly twice as often. (And no, I would not trade for a smaller engine any day.)  We should not have to take this crap, especially when there is no reason for gas to be this expensive. 

So now what? Since my best idea is to hunt down the big oil CEO’s, dowse them in gasoline and light them on fire, I’m stumped.  If only there was a way to organize a nationwide boycott of gasoline for like a week.  But there’s always some jackasses that would fudge it up for the rest of us.