Angry Ken

Disaster Movie

Ken — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 06:13:18 +0000

Every six months or so we get a another one of those “Movie” movies out of Hollywood. Last time it was Meet the Spartans, and despite my ordering people not to see it, they did anyway. By people, I mean idiot teens whose parents are too stupid to teach them any sense. So what happens? We now have Disaster Movie.

I want to murder everyone that was involved in making this movie. Cast, crew, everybody. I’m not going to tell people not to go see this movie because we all know American teens are morons and will go anyway. Worst of all, they will probably laugh and think it’s clever and original. So, in another six months, we’ll have Monster Movie, then Not Another Disaster Movie, then Parody Movie, and finally, Movie Movie.

Your American citizenship should be revoked if you actually go to a theater to see this crap.

You Twit

Ken — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 10:00:50 +0000

I hate Twitter. Like, with a passion! Sure, I have an account, but posting to the site is a total waste of time. Who the hell thinks that anyone else cares about what they are doing around the clock. Get the f*ck over yourself because you are not that important.

Oh, and you can follow Angry Ken on Twitter, but Angry Ken follows no one.

Recognizing Rage

Ken — Sat, 02 Aug 2008 05:49:30 +0000

You know what the worst part about being angry is? Not having an outlet to express my rage. Oh sure, I have this blog, but there are things I cannot talk about for reasons I cannot mention. And it really, REALLY SUCKS!

BUT…

Seems someone has stumbled onto my rantings and has taken notice. I won’t go into the details until I know more myself, but let’s just say more people may soon be exposed to my indifference towards the world/Los Angeles. I’ll keep you posted.

Dark Knight = Awesomz

Ken — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 21:59:08 +0000

I’m not going to sit here and write a 10-page diatribe about the new Batman movie like every other wannabe film critic jackass. I’ll just say that the film was absolutely amazing and that Heath Ledger played the role of The Joker to perfection. It’s such a shame that Ledger won’t be able to reprise the role ever again.

The Dark Knight is about as close to a perfect movie as you can get. This is one film that lives up to all the hype and more. I give it a 10/10.

Time burglars

Ken — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 06:34:49 +0000

You know, if you have a time machine, you should share it with the world and not hold on to it for your own personal gain.

Take Hollywood for example. For years, filmmakers have been going into the future to steal ideas from movies that haven’t even been made yet; like when Stanley Kubrik traveled through time and stole The Simpsons‘ idea for The Shinning. He changed one letter in the title and thought he could get away with it. Let’s also not forget Ghostbusters, a complete ripoff of The Frighteners starring Micheal J. Fox. Star Trek?. There would have never been a Captain Kirk without Captain Picard.

These Hollywood con artists need to be more creative and stop keeping time-travel technology from the rest of humanity.

Angry Photos

Ken — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 05:29:57 +0000

I decided I should use my camera more. Here’s what today brought about.

107k miles and still drives great. You can keep your Bimmers and Benzes.

Oh look, traffic. It must be anytime between 12:01 am and 11:59 pm.

Parking used to be an issue here at the office. There were just too many cars and not enough spaces. No longer an issue. We didn’t even need more room.

Dark windows, thumb scanner and no sign indicating what it is. Nothing sketchy about this place at all.

Mr. Blind Cone ready for another day at the office.

Group photo. (From left: Stupidest things ever said calendar, football, rubix, Barbaro w/remote, Poquito Mas tortilla chips, Mr. Blind Cone w/headphones)

Here we have the highlight of the day.

Tell us how you really feel, Brad.

Tell us how you really feel, Andrea.

How to Tie Nautical Knots

Ken — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 02:04:26 +0000

This is how you tie up a boat:

1. Get a boat.

2. Get some rope.

3. Figure out what you want to tie the boat to. Trees, rocks and groups of small children are options.

4. Tie one end of the rope to the boat and tie the other end to whatever tree, rock or child(ren) you have selected.

5. If you did it right, the boat won’t go anywhere.

There you have it!

Pretzels tied using nautical knots

New iPhone!

Ken — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 02:23:23 +0000

I don’t give a sh*t!

Reno’s Officer Dangle visits Mahalo Daily

Ken — Sun, 25 May 2008 05:17:27 +0000

Check out Lon’s interview with Thomas Lennon (aka Jim Dangle from Reno 911). This is definitely the funniest interview from Mahalo Daily.

You hear that? Neither do I

Ken — Fri, 25 Apr 2008 05:56:36 +0000

Remember a while back when I vowed to rid the earth of a band called Hinder? Well, where have they been? That’s right — DEAD!

Well maybe not dead, but I haven’t heard their music in over a year, which means Angry Ken was victorious. If you have any doubt, think about who’s blog you’re reading right now. Do you hear any lame ass Hinder songs? Exactly.

With Hinder vanquished into musical obscurity, I can focus my efforts on the next craptacular musical act. I haven’t decided who to take down yet, but here are a few choices:

Fallout Boy
Panic at the Disco
Flobots

These bands all totally suck, so I would be doing a service by ridding society of any of them. I’ll have to think about it. In the meantime, feel free to send me any “thanks for getting rid of Hinder” fruit baskets.